Church marquees

The concept of the church marquee is quite interesting, isn't it?
It's original purpose, of course, was to inform reverent and spiritually interested passersby about church service times and other brief but pertinent information.

But somehow over the years it has morphed into an exhibition of uncreative and pithy sayings that are so thick in cheesiness, so poor (oftentimes) in theology, so confusing for those far from God or church culture, so amusing to some Christians and yet so frustrating to so many others. In fact, you can purchase books (yes, on amazon.com no less!) on pithy sayings for your church marquee boards. [Side note: anybody have any best/worst church marquee board sayings you want to share with me? Just leave a quick post...]

I'll just go ahead and say it: most (but certainly not all) church marquees do more harm than good. Most marquee boards simply provide yet another misperception of the Church and what its mission really is. I'm not sure telling people that they should stop by for surgery to receive a "faith lift" helps the cause of Christ or gives hope, offering a clear picture of Christ to a hurting world. Has anybody come to a saving faith in Christ by seeing one of those boards? It's a possibility. But it makes me wonder if, more often than not, it pushes people who are cynical of church even farther away from entering its doors and making those who profess to be Christians seem even more irrelevant and unintelligent.

Some of you might be thinking, 'Oh, J.R., lighten up. It's just good ole fashion church fun.' I beg to differ. Something's gotta change. I've often wondered what would be the best thing to do about with church marquee boards.

I would like to propose three simple solutions:

1. List only service times and pertinent information, like its original intended purpose. This is a good and important thing to be doing. Plus, people only have time to read a few lines while driving by your church sign before they become reckless behind the wheel. (Let me also note that I'm grateful that the church I work at has a simple marquee listing helpful service times and, at times, appropriate and pertinent -- and brief! -- information.)
2. Place a passage of Scripture up on the board. To some this may seem awkward, but I had probably my first wonderful experience with a church marquee message driving home on Monday night. I passed a traditional church with a traditional marquee board on the corner of the property near the road and it simply listed a verse from the Psalms. Unfortunately I can't remember the exact reference, but it spoke of God's goodness and that He is worthy of being praised. Without realizing it until later, the remaining 20 minutes of my drive home I pondered the implications of that verse, chewing on how I might respond to God's goodness and faithfulness in my own life. It was a reminder to me that Scripture never returns void.
3. And if numbers 1 or 2 cannot be followed, take down the church marquee board once and for all.

NOTE: For any of you who are interested in making your own creative, thought-provoking, theologically correct and inviting church marquee messages like the one in this post, log onto www.churchsigngenerator.com. Enjoy!

Comments

[Joan]

JR,
I have to respond to your request for the best and worst church signs. Growing up, my dad was in charge of the sign at our church in NJ. It was located directly across the street from the state college. There was an article in the local paper one day about the signs noting that a porfessor at the college opened each Monday class with a discussion about the sign. I am sure his comments were not complimentary but it gave rise to some discussions! Probably one of the signs most talked about over the years and that most often when I recall from those days is "God's last name is not Dammit"

And by the way - I've had license plates from NJ, PA, CA and CO. It'e been nearly 20 years since I've had CO and I still miss them:)

[Josh]

the thing i find interesting is that a lot of the church signs are actually attacking non-believers, or if they ar enot doing that they are trying to scare them into coming to church. We use to make a big poster for the sermon series. but yeah i agree church signs should onlu be given out to approved operators who think through what they are doing and how people are reading them.

you want some bad ones? here they are

Stop, Drop and Roll doesn't work in Hell

You think this is Hot? just miss Heaven

Read the Bible it will scare the hell out of you

we use duct tape to fix everything. God uses nails

Souled Out

to prevent Sinburn use Soncream

Prevent truth decay, brush up on a tour of the bible

you won't be too busy to die

God expects Spiritual Fruit not religious nuts

[Jenna]

I've forever and always groaned and/or rolled my eyes at the various church marquees. (By the way, this is the first time I've ever heard them called that...I've always called them "cheesy church signs".) But I digress...
A few examples for you:

Can't sleep? Don't count sheep. Talk to the shepherd.

A lot of kneeling will keep you in good standing.

Dusty Bibles lead to dirty lives.

Ch--ch...what's missing? U R.

What is a Christian's favorite vitamin? B 1.

And my personal "favorite" (I almost crashed when I drove past this one due to shock.)
Jesus is my Prozac.

[Brian Zollinhofer]

Hey J.R.

I don't have any good sign ideas (although a few of these were pretty good), but I just wanted to say hello! For some reason I decided to Google Alan (for Antarctic pictures), and then found you! I hope things are going well. Say hello to your lovely wife.

Just so you know, your site is a little off on Firefox 2 for Macs (it's pushed off the white part on the left...)

[S]

Previous church I worked at hired a new SP who loved marquee signs and thought we needed to have some stupid saying on them so the people driving down the highway would see it and think about it. (At 60MPH, no less). So, the one that goes up says, "God never says oops". no big deal right? Till the next week, I open up the City Pages ( kinda like the Independent in the Spgs), and see OUR sign posted on the inside page as the "Viewfinder" for the week - a random picture taken from somewhere around the city. The caption the author wrote underneath says, "Because we live in a perfect world." I nearly fell off my chair laughing (in secret). When the SP saw it, I think he was pretty bewildered and I had to stifle my excitement at our sign making the City Pages (obviously not in a good way).

[Tomislav]

Dude,
I do and have always agreed with you on this issue. There is so much mis-information about followers of Jesus anyway, why do the followers of Jesus in search of more numbers in their building (isn't that the REAL reason for these things?) put more mis-information out there... and another thing, I am a firm believer that churches using these things for moral-political messages hurt the message of the Good News as well! ...oh... I started ranting didn't I? ...sorry... you'd think I was a church marquee, huh? Peace... Happy Thanksgiving from tomislav the traveler

[Comedy Kid]

Another marquee generator on http://www.SignGenerator.org

[todd]

check www.crummychurchsigns.com for an hour or two of good laughs and tears...

[Drew]

Oh man you are so right!! Once Upon a time I was married and at that time my x and I were not Christians. Well one Halloween we decide it would be fun to go to a haunted house. So we looked in the paper and we found one called a Hell House (I am sure most Christians know what it is) well we went to this thing not knowing it was a Christian church thing and it pushed us even further from church and Jesus. It just conformed in our heads that all church people are just narrow minded people that think they are perfect (I know this is not true now). Before we had the fun filled Hell House experience we were actually talking about checking out some church stuff and give it a chance but not after that. I still find it kind of funny to this day out of all the haunted houses we (I) could have picked we go to that ( I am sure she still did not forgave me for that). It was not till some time after the big split that my friend convinced me to check out a service it was like 6 years latter or something. Any ways I could see how a sign could have the same effect.

Drew

[Meredith]

I am in 100% agreement with you. I'm a pastor, and I absolutely cringe whenever I drive past those lousy signs. Those cheesy sayings are spouting bad theology, and they're posted with the intent of making non-church-goers feel guilty.

I try to put up events and worship times, or scripture passages. And sometimes I'll post things which I hope are refreshing, like "You are welcome here."

I've got to go change the sign ...

[basic]

Google Stillstand? Seit gut einer Woche taucht kein einziger Artikel, den wir schreiben, in den Index aufgenommen. Hat jemand ahnliche Erfahrungen? Normalerweise dauert das nur 1-2 Tage bis Google die Artikel im Index auffuhrt. Gehts es anderen auch so?